SnapFoo

Its been long...

2010-08-16T07:40:00.000-07:00

I've graduated high school and moved to a new state since last posting. And I have since decided to enlist in the United States Navy because:
1) I dont know what I want to do for college and do not want to waste money being 'undecided'
2) I want the adventure of going on the high seas
3) I do not want to spend my life paycheck to paycheck because I work at a dead-end job with no future
4) I want to be proud of myself for something.
Some of my family is happy, some not so much. I love my family to death but this is my decision, not theirs, its my life and I will do with it what I will, whether they are behind me or not.
They are, however, making me wait until Im 18 to go forward with anything, which is a drag considering I plan things out carefully and the later I go in the later I get out. So this friday, the 20th, I plan on calling a recruiter.
Im excited but nervous and at the same time terrified that I wont make it in due to stupidity of being young, but the stars say to be patient and things will fall into place.

trouble in paradise

2009-06-25T11:26:00.000-07:00

Time has passed, school year over, friends moved on, and spring is here. What more could a girl ask for? I've been in a relatively great mood for weeks now and all is good, except recently I've been notified by my ten-year-old brother that our nearly two-year-old Xbox 360 has been consumed by the ever dreaded Red Ring of Death. Now, at first I was understandably confused because I had no idea what it initially meant, so I looked it up on the internet and found out that the number of notches( I had three) depicted what exactly was wrong with the machine. 1 notch was something very minor, 2 notches meant a wire wasnt hooked all the way or something along those lines, but 3 and 4 notches meant something was seriously wrong with the 360: as in 3 was a soon-to-come mechanical meltdown and 4 being your $200 360 was dead and there was really nothing you could do about it.
Well, after a bit of research I looked up the problem and how to fix it and it was either spend a bit of money to have Microsoft themselves fix it, which I dont see why they couldnt have just made sure the problem was solved before they shipped out the cargo but whatever, I could buy a new 360, which wasnt going to happen or I could fix the problem myself, which included voiding the warranty, taking apart the entire system and messing around with the motherboard and soldering the disconnected wires myself.
I've taken apart my ps2 and fixed a serious problem it had so I know my way around a game system, but my ps2 was at least five years old when I fixed it and the 360 wasnt nearly as old or as cheap as the sony machinery and I was a little apprehensive about 'having my way' with the white system. After about an hour and a half of exploration and tweaking I couldnt for the life of me find a soldering iron in my house and had to give up and put the xbox back together. Before I went to bed I made sure it would turn on again(success on that but still red ring of death) and went to sleep.
But, Nicole, did you fix the problem?
Yes I did. How?
A towel.
Yes, you read right, a towel. After a bit more research on the 'trusty' Internet, I found out that I could fix my $200 game system with a $3 towel from target. Let me explain...apparently if I wrapped my 360 in a towel and let it run for about 20 minutes the system would overheat and the disconnected wires would 'melt' themselves together. After I followed the above instructions I turned off and on my system once...victory! The formally red ring turned a cheerful green and I was once again able to spend hours on a game that would rot my brain.
All is well in the gaming world once again thanks to a towel and a few distraught fellow gamers who with a bit of curiosity figured out the simplest solution to a problem.
The oh-so-helpful link

sunday bloody sunday

2008-07-27T16:46:00.000-07:00

boredboredbored.

Why?

I'll tell you why.

Its sunday. A hot, lonely, sweaty sunday.

On the plus side, its my mom's birthday. My sister and I got her a logic puzzle book when I saw Dark Knight for the second time, and we made her a card; along with my brother. My dad brought home an ice cream cake, which we'll all eat when they get home from the city.

And I felt like blogging.

But Im bored.

boredboredbored.

2008-07-25T20:49:00.000-07:00

I saw The Dark Knight the other day.

LOVED IT

Heath Ledger was amazing. Ive seen him in other movies before but he was so disturbing in Dark Knight.

As great as the movies was there always has to be a flaw in the plan right? Right.

Let me lay down the setting: My house around 2ish maybe. Ashley call Lexlex and asked her if we wanted to see The Dark Knight, I asked if I could bring my sister and said yes. Plan set.

However we planned on a silly boy,(lets just call him 'Unsure' for now, shall we?), Unsure, to give us a ride to the movies because he is the only one of us, with us, with his licence.

Lets skip ahead a few hours to lexlex's house.

Unsure tells us he wont give us a ride but lex's grandma can, which means my sister, who wanted to see this movie since they announced its premiere, couldnt go with us. I had been informed later that after I had told her she started crying, making me feel like shit.

Well lexlex and I went with Ashley and a few other people. Fabulous except for 4 girls in front of us giggling and being the shit headed whores they'll be in 10 years. At least until I said 'shh'. Lol little thing to say except they didnt say anything else the rest of the movie. yay for raising self esteem!

Next day I see it again with my sister and had little kids behind us kicking our seat /:

Well Im tired so bonne nuit.

Honestly Im just bored.

2008-07-22T14:14:00.000-07:00

3 weeks ago I moved into my new house.

huzzah.

I love it. Even the little dent mark in the kitchen and the cracked tile in the bathroom.

I forgot how much I loved apartment life. It always was comforting to me. There's a pond/lake thing right outside our patio that I can fish in.

I wanted to show my friends but after I unpacked my clothes I droped my phone in the box and moved it into the living room. I couldnt find it forevvvver. When I did actually get it back I had about 20 missed calls and only 1 new voicemail.

Honestly I think what annoys me the most is that of all the people who called me only one person had the decentsy to verbally let me know they called. If I have more than one missed call, my phone wont let me know who called except for the last person. So I only knew that my lexlex <3 called(besides her voicemail).

Then I ran past my friend Josh on my way home from the library and he tells me he called me on one of those 20 missed calls. bah.

I think I may actually be not 'likeing' this summer.

0>-<

0>-=

0]-{

0}-[

lol see them?

Ramblings of an insomniac or pure genuis?

2008-07-04T23:19:00.000-07:00

blah.

So, it's 1:20 am on saturday July 5 and Im too awake to go to sleep, but too tired to go down stairs and do anything.

I move on monday, the 7th. Im really excited, mainly because I can still go to my high school. First time that's ever happened. My sister's birthday is tomorrow. News wise, I think that's it.

My lexi's birthday was last week and we went to the Taste of Chicago with her sisters and their boyfriend/friend. Honestly, I was glad to go. I havnt left my house once except for that day this summer( at least that I can remember). It was a lot of fun and Im glad I went. Then that sunday she had the party. Twas...depressing for me. I wasnt feeling well and was out of my comfort zone so I left early, knowing that if I stayed I would have started crying and ruining everything for her. As I started walking home I started feeling bad and now I think she may be mad at me.

But when I went home that day I looked up a bunch of shit, as I always so, and started looking at info on shyness and started feeling so crappy about everything. Being shy sucks ass and the only people who understand that are people who are shy to atleast the extent that I am, because it is incredibly debilitating.

What sucks more is I just realised I used a wrong flower for a spell and now it might not work.

hell :/

heaven forbid i speak the truth

2008-06-22T15:02:00.000-07:00

For a while now I've been thinking about some things. Mostly just personal things, but also things that involve my future.

Im graduating high school in less then 2 years and that scares me.

My family cant afford to help me pay for college, mind I may not even go to college if I stick to what I want to be, I cant get a job because Im too young and people wont hire me.

Im also worried about my passion, traveling. I want to travel everywhere, London, Paris, Dublin, Mumbai, Tokyo, Hong Kong. I get so excited about the very thought of meeting people from every country.

But again sneaks up the issue of money. Im getting desperate.

Really desperate.

It gets so scary that I cant even talk to people about it. I just sit and think and hope.

Oh man...

2008-03-09T18:17:00.000-07:00

hmmm....

Im starting to hate school more and more.

I wish it were all over. Yet. I don't want it to be over. I never want school to be over.
I just want to get rid of everybody. Everybody in my classes, everybody in the hallway, and even everyone of my few friends.
I don't want either of them.

All they do is insult me and make me feel stupid and alone. And honestly, it's not worth it.
My friend always makes fun of me for being in regular Biology and I got mad so I told her that the only difference between my class and her class is that her class is "more faster". A simple grammatical mistake like that and she mocks me and says, " is that why you're in English regulars too?".

I laughed. Only because I didn't want people to see I was hurt.

But I was hurt. Really hurt. And I cant even say anything to her about it because I know she will just laugh it off as if it was no big deal and say she's sorry and didn't mean it.

She just doesn't seem to understand what's coming out of her mouth and the impact it has on people.

I love you. I really do, but if you cant stop insulting me like that, then something has got to give.

2008-03-08T16:09:00.000-08:00

I FEEL LIKE NOBODY CARES!

That's what I want to yell to everybody in this wretched world. To me it is as if I have to play stupid just to keep up with everyone. And what's worse is that I feel that even my friends don't notice the pain I'm in. The thought of hurting myself comes into my mind more and more everyday. The fantasy of staying in that white hospital bed with nobody around becomes ever more comforting.

When I was at the peak of my depression, I used to have this fantasy that I was standing in a huge open field of tall crab grass, no house, roads, cars near. The clouds look as if they are going to drop rain, but they never do. The air smells of a storm and thunder can be heard in the distance. There is not another human for miles, I'm alone...peaceful and undisturbed. It brings tears to my eyes just to think about it, that longing for something I cant have. I should try and think more positive, but the more positive I get the more negative I realise I can be. It is as if nothing matters anymore. Nothing is important. Not school, friends, lovers, not even family. I secretly wish I could be taken from this world, with no memory of me to anyone I ever met.

Nothing.

As if I never existed.

2008-01-04T17:35:00.001-08:00

*Caution* Emo-ness coming up *You have been warned*

Is it so wrong to just want to feel 'accepted'? No matter where I go, what I do, who I'm with, I always feel as if I shouldn't be there. If I'm having a conversation with my friends, I feel as if I shouldn't even be there, as if people don't want me there but talk to me anyway(just so I don't feel left out). If I'm even a millimeter close to getting a guy to like me...BAM...he backs off and I hardly see him anymore, if I do, it just gets awkward. It sucks, for real, and everyone I express this to says, oh you should go find him, you should figure this out on your own, you should this, you should that. Wow you guys, thanks, this is why I don't tell anybody anything anymore. Again I will say that I love you all, I cant say that enough.

*Emo-ness has ended*

Hmm....

2007-12-11T18:36:00.000-08:00

I miss my friends. I do. I miss being with them and not having moments of silence. I love my friends so very much but lately it seems like we all are drifting apart. I know that is one of the consequences of going into high school, but I will do my utmost to try and make it not happen.

I just wish I could cry with them sometimes, or just hug them and never let go. Times are changing. We are no longer little kids, no, we are high school students with lives and jobs.

But my other side...doesn't want to believe that. It wants everyone to come outside and play. To go to the park and just swing or slide down the slide.

I'm moving away from them...so is another one of my friends. That only makes the situation that much worse.

Lets just cross our fingers and home things get better.

2007-11-25T19:19:00.000-08:00

I got a hair cut today! I absolutely love it. Though in the beginning I was a bit nervous because I let my mom, whom has as much experience with cosmetology as a monkey with a pair of scissors, cut my hair. Oddly I trusted her and while she was cutting away at my, then mid-back, beautiful hippy hair all I could think about what why some people dont even give their parents the time of day. Not a phone call, not a simple hello. When I see teenagers(about my age) walking ahead of their moms in a mall or yelling at their dads to stop 'embarrassing' them in front of that oh-so-cute boy, who may actually be a complete jerk, I want to cry for them because for some reason I feel the pain the parents are feeling, even if they are not showing it. I always wonder if their kids understand the pain their parents are feeling. Yes, health, life, and love are what a parent wants in their kids but I believe that all a parent really wants is to be trusted enough to cut their childs hair.

Love ya mom and dad

2007-11-23T16:34:00.000-08:00

Today I was playing Urbz: Sims in the City. The point to the game is to go around different cities with different people and become friends with them. After about half an hour playing the game I decided to look on the back of it and read what it said, just for the fun of it. What did I read? One line that caught my eye was "Change your look. It affects how people react to you!"

I thought this was funny, for many reasons, most of which Im sure you can guess.

My 9 year old brother has a video game that completely off set me called 25 To Life. The cover seemed to explain the game but I thought I'd take a look on the back. I can tell you that I honestly almost didnt give the game back to my brother. Right on the back where it tells you what the game is about it said, "Play with up to 16 people, make a gang, kill traitors, and run from the police..." I could not believe that my parents had let a 9 year old even look at such a game, but they did.

I will honestly tell you that I am not a big believer on the theory that video games with violence affect a kids decisions in life, but now that I think about it these two games are only a spoon-full of what kids are playing these days. In The Urbz, you have to dress like the people in that city for them to accept you, is this not some how able to influence a kid's mind. In 25 To Life, you have to create a gang, kill people, rob casinos, and steal from stores, if that is not a little extensive for a game I dont know what is. Yes, parents should be watching what kids are playing and buying. In a perfect world everybody under 18 will only play E and T rating games but kids are getting a hold of games that are rated M and even the Devil of Ratings, AO. If a teen cant get a hold of the game from their parents, they go to a friends house, where they might have it.

Get out there and vote, for heavens sake.

2007-11-09T20:35:00.001-08:00

At what point did the American way of 'Free Speech!' and 'Accept All!' become a second opinion? When did that philosophy end up being thrown out of the window? Now, I will not try to act like I am older then I actually am, but I do remember that when I was in fourth grade the Presidential debate had begun with George W. Bush and Al Gore. My school had done a thing where all the students would have a 'mini' vote. For some reason, even way back then, I had a strange feeling that George Bush was not someone who would bring a positive outlook to the people of the United States, but never the less George Bush ended up winning the mini-vote and the real vote and became the new President of the United States. From what I can remember, at first he was an ok guy, then 9/11 happened. The sensitive subject of many people dying was fully blamed on Al-Qaida; a terrorist group in the middle east. With the people of America in complete disarray and in a very weak point emotionally, we needed someone to blame, so we believed what ever was thrown our way. Im going to safely say that that is when things started to go down hill. The first mistake Bush made was to go to war with Iraq. His reason? 1)To stop a civil war, 2)Stop, or at least slow down, the production and distribution of the plant used to make heroine, and 3)Stop anti-american propaganda or any thing related. My opinion? Bush had absolutely no right to put the American people in danger because he wasnted to appear as the 'hero' of his story, which we call LIFE. Him saying that he wanted to kill to stop a civil war in a different country is absolutely ridiculous. It is really, none of our business, but because we were tricked in to a war it is now, in some way, our duty to carry out the mission of no missions. Does George Bush honestly think that he is going to be able to do anything about the production and distribution of heroine? Is his sense of reality that far up in the clouds? Drugs are coming in from everywhere! Not just the middle east, what makes them so special. What about, oh say, Cuba? Which is a LOT closer then the middle of Europe. His plan to stop people from hating us, has backfired so bad that Im sure the American people will be feeling the shame for eons to come. Not only did we make a permanent enemy of places in the middle east, but now places far from the middle east are loathing us. The British think we all have never had a lick of education in our lives, the Asians think we will murder just for a wrong look, all because we voted for the wrong person. But dont worry, George W. Bush is not all to blame for the United States downfall, no. The American people are. Isnt it time that we open up our eyes to what surrounds us and take charge of what goes on in our country, is it a democracy, am I right. The world doesnt see America as individual people, it sees us as the leader we vote for. If we vote for cocky morons to be our leader, American people are seen as cocky morons.